To Die Is To Live Again 3-22-21
Black silhouetted ravens dance amongst gathering clouds
Soaring high above me, I imagine myself, there, with them.
Reminding myself to notice the subtle nuances of nature,
Contrasting colors, the sounds of music playing on the wind,
The sadness that has dogged me of late begins to fade some.
I am thinking of a broken world, a broken spirit, a broken me
How to fix any of it, if even feasible and where would I begin?
Perhaps it is not possible to fix, making things right is relative.
Considering what is and accepting things as they are, as imperfect,
Presents an opportunity to let go of the mounting outrage.
To recognize that which is outrageous is not the same thing
As finding myself lost in the maize and seduction of egregiousness.
Stepping back into a balancing perspective clears my vision,
A chance to see what it is I can do and what I cannot change.
Receding into minuteness helps me to see the broader picture.
Allowing myself to be lost, to be directionless to feel purposeless
To float freely high above the clouds, abandoning all like the birds,
Letting the sorrow, disappointment and fear fly away with the wind.
Perhaps I might discover within this weightlessness, some comfort
A restoring of my fractured soul, a chance to find a lasting peace.
The frenetic distractions of life do not satisfy the emptiness.
Frantically pouring kinetic cement into all the cracks and holes
Serves only to buy a bit of time, delaying the inevitable pain of loss.
The fire breathing dragon waits patiently for me to succumb
So now, I cease the running and fighting, letting flames consume me.
Lying quietly in the darkness of my tomb, surrendering to nature,
This is my return to the dust which first created me so long ago.
In life we die many times, to reappear, renewed, more than before.
Brokenness is necessary in all things for ongoing change to occur.
So it is with me, another resurrection for my wounded soul to come home .